it’s been slowly approaching. i’ve been feeling good. i can feel the good things coming my way. the achievements i’m going to celebrate, the people i’m going to do so with, the happiness and joy incoming.
i’ve been keeping a list since the beginning of the year of days that feel ‘fated’ – that just feel different and special. i can’t pinpoint what the feeling is exactly, as it’s never the same; it’s just a knowledge that the date will matter in the future. so far, that lists consists of:
- friday, february 21st
- monday, june 2nd
- (saturday, june 5th)
- thursday, july 24th
- tuesday, august 12 & wednesday, august 13
- (friday, august 22nd)
i’m very good at keeping track of memorable dates: birthdays, anniversaries, celebrations. they’re some of the only things i’m actually able to keep track of consistentely. i always wonder if any of these ‘fated days’ represent something like my wedding anniversary, of the birthday of one of my future children. i love thinking that they hold such significance to me in the future that i’m somehow able to feel that joy and emotion retrospectively. (i suppose that actually proves that i believe in fate & a sort of predestined timeline – i knew i somewhat did, but this solidifies it).
it’s days where life just feels different, for no particular reason. they don’t seem to coincide with any other event that would cause that dopamine rush (e.g., date or conversation planned or anything), but seem to hold significance all on their own. how lovely 😀
it always creeps up on me, never lasting the entire day.
today hasn’t felt particularly special at all, dull if anything actually.
i must get ready to go to dinner to celebrate my belated birthday with family – i may continue to write later, although we shall see. i’ve been feeling happy lately, always evidenced by my lack of entries here.
to love for the hope of it all 
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